At Holland's 6 month appointment Dr. Pepper said that I could start letting Holland cry in the night to help her sleep a full 11-12 hours. The sleeping part sounded good to me, but me attempting to get her there is the day I am dreading. Though Jaret and I are exhausted from getting up with her, I'm still not sure if I will be able to let her cry for more than a few minutes. I've heard so many opinions of how mothers feel both ways.
Anyway, our little pip-squeak still wont roll over. I spoke with a nurse today who told me that as long as she's fed and changed that it's fine to let her cry as long as needed to help her roll. "Hmmmm", I thought. "Perhaps she will really do it if she works her self up enough." So, I set her on her belly and put her bottle to the side. She cried...and cried...and cried...and cried. And I just watched her wishing she would get it. I know she can do it. She just doesn't want to. Jaret and I roll her over and over and she fights it ever time. So, I tortured myself while watching her torture herself. I thought about how Heavenly Father has to do this every day. He lets us go through hard things for our own good. The sad thing is that sometimes we just don't get it. Eventually most of us DO get a few things, but some never get there. That is very heart breaking. Holland continued to cry on and off. All of her efforts put into crying and rubbing her face on the ground rather than getting her bottle. Finally she put her head down and cried herself to sleep. All the time watching her from the shadows, I shed a tear and picked my little girl up.
I don't feel like Holland is closer to rolling over due to that whole episode. It is hard to know what is best for my little girl. I hope that she will someday know that even though I let her go through hard things I am always there to love her.
2 comments:
I know im not a mom but i believe that moms know best! follow your heart and if you feel like she will get it eventually dont bother torturing yourself. maybe if you just relax about it she will surprise you:) Sometimes i think we put so much pressure on what they should be doing and want them to do it so bad that they purposly dont do it!! Your and exceptional mother and im sure with a little prayer and following the spirit and your motherly instincs you will know!!
Ha, Ha, Is funny to me that my memorise of that stage were just as heart braking to ME! Parker would scream and scream to. I do remember not liking it when people would say "Oh, It's okay He will get it soon enough" because to "you" it such a big deal. "You" love your child so much and want them to develop on the time line that is layed outin the books... if not before that because that would be amazing. I think we just have to take in consideration the kind of personality your child has if they are calm and content it may take longer than a child who is over confadent. Right now I get exited about the times when Parker will stand by himself for 5 seconeds even though sometimes I wish he would take one step and calm my angziety and over active imagination thinking that he will be one of those kids that dosen't walk till he's 18 months old. Over the past year though I have learned that He likes to do things on his own time and not on mine and I guess that is okay with me... today. I think that the comment above is very true to but I don't feel like I have that Mom's instinct very strongly. Maybe that is why being close to the spirit is so important. I hope this makes you feel a little bit better. Luv you!
Britt
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